Thoughts on Triathlon

(Editors Note:  I don’t think the author knows much about triathlon)  I know a few Triathletes, they are amazing people and among the most fit that I know.  I don’t like them.  I mean, I like them fine as people, I just don’t like them as cyclists which of course they aren’t, they are triathletes.  My point is they don’t cycle right, you know the way I do.

m_hutto

When I have had the opportunity to ride with triathletes I’ve noticed they have one speed, fast, or what I might call riding tempo.  Riding at a level that is well below their threshold.  Even more annoying they hold this level of effort with complete disregard to the world around them.  A hill approaches, same effort, someone attacks, same effort.  It’s like riding a trainer.  Sure, after the hill, the attack, or whatever, they end up catching back up, seemingly unfazed by the obstacle and passing, but so what, their heart rate probably never went over 130 bpm.

Another thing about triathletes, they’re so busy, with all that training, they don’t have time to take 5 hour mountain bike rides that covers 9 miles.  So what’s up with triathlon anyway, why are those specific sports all combined together?  What if someone invented trigeeklon where competitors engaged in a chess match, followed by a round of some first person shooter video game, and ending with a judged debate to determine the most powerful comic superhero. Hey that’s not a bad idea, I should copyright that.

Here’s another thing I don’t like about triathletes, besides being so damn fit, they are so freaking organized.  I mean downright obsessive about details.  It’s like someone invented a sport that caters to obsessive engineer types.  It’s all about pace, power, marginal gains, balancing complex training schedules, and having a pristine bike that DOESN’T FOLLOW UCI RULES!  It’s not right. People shouldn’t be that organized, and they shouldn’t be allowed to have tubing with a height greater then three times it’s width, it’s not right and they know it!

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About Matt Gholson

Cycling, school teaching, husband.
This entry was posted in Barn Door Cycling, Rants and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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